During this war, I exchanged many emails with many people from different places, the most interested in the political side was naturally a Jewish American. At many points, many of them, concluded that it’s simply so difficult to live in such a divided country.
I mean, yes I understand why they might say so. But in fact, I don’t find Lebanon to be THAT divided, as if Lebanon’s an artificial country. Maybe that results of my subjectivity, but I simply find Lebanon so Lebanese, even though I am deeply pessimistic about the future of my home, I am convinced that Lebanon was not simply an aberration of history, a regretful mistake.
Well, I suppose it’s absurd to talk like this since I wouldn’t be here if I had half a chance to leave. But this is how I feel, it’s the stupid patriotism, but I am simply stupid. Somehow, each person in Lebanon is very unique, very Lebanised. Take Hezbollah for example, they wear like Iranians, they’d prefer cooperate with Hezbollah than with any Lebanese, but Hezbollah’s no one in fact, Hezbollah’s a political party no more no less. Well, in fact it’s a little less than that. Hezbollah’s taking advantage of many factors, but he is not the core of Shiia. In that sense Amal is closer to the spirit of Shiia than Hezbollah. Tomorrow things will clear, and tomorrow people will see, Shiia are just simple people, and just like simple people they just want to live and to provide the best for their children.
And the Shiia in Lebanon are not the Shiia of Iran, they are Lebanese, they just don’t understand that Hezbollah and Iran doesn’t love them any better than we do. Didn’t we all cry to see the victims die? Regardless of the victims’ sect. Sure we did.
I wonder how tomorrow’s Lebanon will be? I know for a fact that sooner or later Christians will drop to the level of “memory”. I know that, but I wonder if I will live to see the Christian Lebanese a meaningless minority. After all the reflections about this subject, I don’t think it bothers me all that much, in fact I think that’s the natural way it should happen, times change, but I worry about those who will be born at those times.