I suppose that whining is a bad sign, but that's my very honest feeling right now, take it or leave it.
So the big guy graduated. Should I repeat the famous cliché: “it passed too fast!”. But then, maybe not, I’m too cool to repeat what others say. Saturday, my mom went to her kids’ first promotion. Neither I nor my brother ever had a promotion party in high school. She went there with my little brother. And that’s her description:
Oh Becca it was just beautiful. There were a mass and then after that they gave them those “rolled papers”. And then when Charbel’s name (My brother’s friend) was pronounced Georges (my little brother) started yelling and applauding as if he was going to go crazy.
Then they said Zouzou’s name and that when we both started applauding and yelling as if we were crazy.
Oh Becca it was so beautiful in that beautiful black graduation dress, and then they threw there hats in the air, oh Georges…Come and show your sister what did Zouzou do with the hat… Georges comes in, he was playing with something, takes the hat, and throws it as far as he could! That’s off topic? You’ll have to get used to it, because my mom incrusts various topics in one LARGE compilation.
And then we ate, it was pretty unorganized, they did not… censorship cuts off unnecessary and very very boring details …
Oh Rebecca it was so beautiful, if only you were there, if only your dad was there. I should have called him as soon as I knew We only knew about it Saturday morning.
Part of the decoration was a very sweet sort of basket, I wanted to take one, but Zouzou asked me not to, since… Censorship…
I always used to dream that you Plural form would one day graduate and I’d go and see you. I was so so happy, wish you were there. Now Georges is still far away from graduating, but you’ll graduate next year. Khay!
Me trying to reduce my mom’s enthusiasm:
Mama I’m in the National University, we have no promotions or anything
What else was I supposed to say to an Ultra happy mom:
Come on Mama, I’m probably not graduating next year, and besides, I don’t want to graduate, because then you’d realize what a loser your perfect daughter really is!?
My mom doesn’t seem to mind my inappropriate lack of enthusiasm to my own graduation.
W’iza, we’ll make you a promotion, Khay...
Becca’s version of her brother’s graduation:
Don’t tell anyone about this people, but I’m burning with jealousy! Yes I’m simply jealous. I always was jealous of the smart successful Zouzou. I was always the white sheep, the perfect daughter, he always was the black sheep and smart ass that everybody feared (since they all failed to tame him) and everybody worshiped (the kid’s a Genius!).
I won’t sink into describing my complex relationship with my brother it can simply be resumed with two Dogmas:
- I totally depended on him
- I always was jealous of him
In the last few years pressure was very high on Zouzou, because he had repeatedly failed high school graduation (no he never graduated from high school). People simply pointed him with there finger saying among themselves:
“What will all his intelligence serve him if he can’t make it through high school.”
Then they’d point out the Perfect (in other terms, submissive, total freak, the one that doesn’t threat there ego) Rebecca and say:
”That’s someone who knows how to take care of herself; she finished her classes without any failure. She’s calm and decent. Very remarkable, she has a future!”
Very few people thought my brother would ever graduate. But Zouzou fucked them all! He graduated long before me, and even if there is nothing “official” about his graduation (since he never finished high school). He has found a very promising job in Orbit, well paid and even before he had finished his job (the job offer literally came knocking on his door!).
As for me. I am still here, watching everything flow around me as if I was God almighty, as if I was immune to everything around me. 2 years ago I still had faith that I would become a good biologist and that I can actually find a good spot in life, something that feels right.
Well… I still have at least 40 years to achieve that right?
( probably not).