Friday, September 24, 2010
كاستر سيمينيا”… أو نكتة الجندر”
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Crossposting: عن الذاكرة الذكورية والنسوية الحلزونية
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
Crossposting - !شكراً “مكرزل” لمزيد من الذكورية
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
Ne lui parlez plus d’elle
Sophia©2008 john sloan
At every turning point of your life, you will suffer… No one and nothing can protect you. A long time ago Pazuzu decided that God was unable to save her out of her misery. She was right. But yet she lived to see another day. At every turning point she had to suffer. There were nothing to hide her away from it, it’s because Anguish comes from the inside, if you hide Anguish will occupy a greater portion of your own time and Anguish will scream into your ears. If you escape to the hands of Lover, Anguish will feel jealous and will haunt both you and Her, She will scream in your face telling you how you hurt Her and how you had no right to… even if you never hurt Her. If you run for your family their sincerely honest, yet hardly understanding, faces will be mirrors and in the mirror you will see Anguish. If you call for a friend, she will hug you, but then the second day you’ll wake up and the taste of blood would still be in your mouth, you run back to your friend and suddenly Anguish will grab your throat whispering in your ear that you are nothing but an annoying loser.
Anguish has a lover and that lover’s name is Tears. Anguish and Tears are soul mates; their love is a constant battle field where they satisfy their thirst with each other’s blood. Tears will make love to your soul, cuddle you and keep you warm. But then when the warmth is so delicious Tears will look around for Tears’ lover, then Tears will run after Anguish and they will renew their love over your body.
Bruised and hurt you will search for Happiness but Happiness is a player, Happiness will always be close enough for you to hope but never too close for you might capture Happiness. You see Happiness is like a nymph, Happiness likes to laugh and dance and you can never dance as fast as Happiness or laugh as hard. Happiness knows that and will never let you tie her up.
And whatever you do, do not run after Hope! Hope is the most vicious of all. Hope’s lover is deception. Hope would do anything to please Deception. So whatever you do, don’t get anywhere near Hope!
In the end when all has failed Pazuzu, when she sat silently on the cold marble of her pedestal, she looked down at the world and a warm air caressed her scales and for a moment she knew what it was like to be human, how the soft skin of humans felt when the air gently warmed it. And it felt good.
She waved her hand for Lover, Lover was snuggled in the arms of Enemy. But Pazuzu screamed to her anyway, she yelled:
C’est vraiment bizarre comment tout d’un coup je ne t’aime plus, mais si en ce moment tu me regarde d'un œil tendre, le BonDieu dans toute sa gloire ne saurait que serait ma réponse.
Lover didn’t hear a word Pazuzu said, so Pazuzu went on :
Tu sais, la liberté … c’est une illusion… tu vois, les chaînes qui m’étranglent le sont aussi. Même la douceur de tes mains me dérange désormais, même l’odeur de ta peau ne me séduit plus… Enfin, je t’aime tu vois… Mais je t’oublierais tu le sais bien. Non tu ne le sais pas, car je ne t’oublierais jamais, à jamais je chanterais mais ça ne me ridiculiserait pas car personne ne le saurais, je chanterais si bas que moi-même je n’entendrais pas ma propre voix. Mais tu sais ce qui serait très sympa ? si tu cessais d’exister… créature du vent et du sable, je ne suis qu’une pauvre montagne arrête de m’éroder, disparais ! tes caresses me font mal…
The wind finally ceased and Pazuzu spread her wings and flew away, to where there is nothing but Silence. Silence is scary, she’s a black widow that ingests her venom without a scar. Captivated by her deep black eyes you will stare into her eyes helplessly as she drains your internal organs liquefied by her invisible venom.
So it took Pazuzu great courage to break free. But freedom is an illusion and finally, Pazuzu gave in and fell to the floor. Remorse detected her scent and came to scavenge on her decaying soul. Remorse has long teeth and they hurt like hell. Remorse felt sorry when it hurt the painful moans of Pazuzu and just left her there to die so it can peacefully eat.
In deep sleep Pazuzu felt her muscles relax for the first time… and it felt good. Darkness reigned inside her closed eyes and she cherished the beautiful feeling of surrender.
Then morning came and gave Pazuzu another chance. Now she remembers nothing of her past, so when you meet her, make sure you never tell her about Lover, the mere mention of her name will unleash all the memories and bring back all the feelings that tormented her soul… let that be our secret!
Thursday, October 04, 2007
Orca's: Out of your posterior
What struck me as odd is that it’s usually men that he has operated, I am sure that there were women, but maybe women don’t need to stick things up their asses so often. After all, if it is for sexual pleasure we can always get a guy or a dildo, men wouldn’t. But what about the psychological disorders… we have lots of that too!
Friday, September 28, 2007
Dentist in Islamic headscarf row
I don’t know why I keep checking the BBC news, at times it just doesn’t seem to make sense at all. Now I expected some other bloggers to mention this but no one did and I just had to say a few things. This woman decides to go to this clinic cause it’s closer to home, right? That’s natural, we all do that anyway. Then she is informed that she must be a Muslim to receive treatment in this clinic AND that she needs to put a scarf too… What does she do? Instead of calling the police and informing them of this unethical and illegal act, she just goes there never the less and just wears some decent cloth. I don’t know if I were her I would inform authorities about it don’t you think? You see this reminds me of the time when I used to go to church every week, some priests, including ours, insisted that women should wear decent cloths and refused to give the girls undecently dressed the Eucharist… Remember that the only thing that denies you the grace of receiving the Eucharist is sin. So in other words not being dressed according to the codes decided by the priest is passable for sin, however, no priest is given the right to deny anyone the Eucharist, cause the priest might be god’s representative on earth but he is not god. The same goes for this doctor, he is not allowed to deny anyone medical treatment… right?
But let’s not insist on that point. So the woman goes there, without the veil, enters the clinic, then meets the dentist who gives her a lecture about Islam and the relationship between the man and the woman (typical religiously concealed sexism, I bet he even told her about how men can’t control themselves in the presence of promiscuous women!). Then, surprisingly, the woman accepts! Like Holly Fuck!! WHY?! I Why the hell does she take this shit from anyone?!
Wait wait, that’s not all, the dentist then demands her to go to the waiting room, wearing the scarf, and wait for a while before entering for the surgery! Like maybe he is giving her time to purify herself? But this time the woman finally revolts and refuses to go on and just leaves, without the scarf!
When the woman pressed charges the dentist certainly denied everything.
Being a woman that actually lives in an environment and encourages and glorifies such pudic acts, I have to say this, something doesn’t feel right in this story. In any normal situation the woman could have refused to go all together. The fact that she did go and she did accept to wear the scarf… But not in the waiting room! With all due respect I find this to be repulsively hypocritical! It’s her legitimate right to get the treatment she needs and no ultra religious sexist with power issues has the right to impose arbitrary rules on her, if she accepted then she must have some other motives behind her act! Now of course I support the fact that she would press charges against the idiot as late as it was, the guy should have his license canceled or something. He should be castrated then he won’t have any filthy desires towards women regardless of their dressing, now why doesn’t he do that?
But there is one last thing that intrigues me… When the woman went to the police, before making this whole subject public, why didn’t any female officer call the guy and try to arrange an appointment, just to check if the guy does refuse to treat some women?
Saturday, April 07, 2007
Playmate necrophilia
Stratten was laying face down on the end of Snider's waterbed, the side of her face and one of her fingers blown off by a 12 gauge shotgun blast. Nearby was Snider, lying on top of the Mossberg shotgun he had used to kill Stratten before turning it on himself; his face between his eyes was gone and his left eyeball was dangling out of its socket. Both of them were nude and covered in ants; Stratten's body was determined to have been moved post-mortem, and further examination of the body turned up several bloody fingerprints, determined to be Snider's. On her posterior were two perfectly formed bloody handprints, also determined to be Snider's. Next to Stratten's corpse was a home-made sex apparatus that Snider had designed to support a woman in a frog-like position for the purpose of anal sex. Police determined that after Snider killed Stratten, he fastened her corpse to the apparatus with medical tape and sodomized her for the next half-hour before un-strapping her and then killing himself.
Not that I would defend this guy or giving him any excuses, there’s no excuse to return Dorothy to life or change what has been done.
But in the end I have read a lot about the traumatism and the great agony that rape victims suffer from, how they never really heal, how some would start sleeping with their shoes on, in case their rapist come back (in that case they’d be ready to run away), how they sleep with the lights on, how they never trust men ever again…
And how many times have we heard about guys raping women then killing them, imagine the horrible death! Nothing’s more precious to a woman than her intimacy and rape is not the most pleasant memory to leave this world with.
This guy raped her after her death, she felt none of it. She just died and everything ended there, she never knew what happened to her body after it, so maybe death is a bliss after all. And maybe that guy did something right in the end.
And think of what he did to himself, I wonder what he felt. He must’ve felt so terrible didn’t he?
Why can’t anything be perfect?
Tuesday, April 03, 2007
So here’s another bus story…
- He’s in a hurry
- He’s so pissed off he just doesn’t care what happens and how much he’s going to make
- He’s trying to be alone with me
Though I am an extremely gorgeous lady that men stand in line just to see a glance of my hypnotizing skin (notice the sarcasm in my tone), I don’t think this guy wanted to hit on me, because on one hand he didn’t even look at me and on the other hand I was sitting right behind him there fore he couldn’t see or talk to me properly.
Now back to our story… I sat comfortably in my seat, a quick eye contact with the driver and I had decided that he was “ok”, normal, probably not a Homo jerkus. My I-pod’s battery are empty (yes my Christmas gift was an I-pod…. Merci wazwaz). So I just looked out of the window, that’s my only real joy in life anyway. Two other girls got into the bus. They later went down. That’s when we moved to the next step.
-You know… today has been totally useless…
He said out of nowhere, my only answer was a friendly smile, why not? He seems harmless and I have known many harmful guys in my life I now have a nose for these people.
- I have been working like a dog since 7 am with a bleeding heart… The stress is too much…
Again I just smiled.
- At 8 am, I thought I’d just stop this nonsense, go to the countryside and relax, but in the end I decided against it.
- Yalla… It’ll pass. It has to. Somehow it will
He just nodded in approval. Then the conversation went on and on about nothing. Apparently we were both tired and depressed, two lonely people in an empty bus. We complained about the economic situation in Lebanon, we complained about the Lebanese stupidity. As a conclusion he wished me luck in my life
-… To win the lottery maybe
- I don’t even participate in lotteries
- Haha. Well maybe, you’ll pick up a winning card on the floor… Who knows who knows…
We laughed. When I reached my destination, I reached out to my pocket to pay him, of course he tried to refuse but I insisted. And then I went down. He didn’t ask for my phone number, not even for my name… Really NOT a Homo jerkus. I turned back a few steps away to wave my hand with a friendly goodbye he nodded in a friendly way and that was it…
Why can’t people always be friendly and just act normal, is it that hard? Why should people like this guy be an exception?
